6:27 PM 3/2/11
As soon as I sit down to write this - actually, it started before that. I was napping and they woke me up and told me to write. As soon as I sit down and prepare to type, I feel the sensation of my mind being read and controlled, so that not a single word can be written from my own mind.
I have to tell the drug residue story again. There is no short way to tell the story, but I'll try to make it short anyway.
At my other apartment, I grew some medicinal plants indoors. I grew St. John's Wort, and I also started growing tobacco. I also handled, and tried to plant several other seeds, including coffee, tea (camellia sinensis), cacao, ephedra sinica, and butterfly weed. I wasn't planning to eat the butterfly weed - it was going to be a flower for decorative purposes.
I wanted stimulant drugs because of my severe fatigue. I have had problems with fatigue for a while, but it was very severe at the time because of black mold in the air at that apartment, and also because St. John's Wort causes excessive sleeping (hypersomnia).
I don't know how many of the seeds caused the problem, but I only became aware of it while handling the ephedra seeds, because they were the most noticeable. I was planting them, and then all of a sudden had a severe reaction as though I had actually taken the drug, but I had done nothing except touch them.
I knew about herbal drugs going through skin already - I had learned that St. John's Wort goes through the skin. But I thought it was a rare exception. It turned out that many herbal drugs go directly through the skin.
Over time I observed that the seeds and the envelopes that they came in had left spots of residue where they were left sitting, like on the carpet where the envelope had been, and places that I touched during and after handling the seeds, and so on. Tiny traces of seed residue were enough to trigger severe reactions afterwards.
I learned to notice this every time I was handling, or just breathing the air next to, seeds, and also bottles of herbal drugs on the shelves in the grocery store. You can have a mild reaction without ever taking the drug. Vapors and residues surround the plant, the seeds, and the containers that they are in.
I tried to clean up the residues in my apartment. I had the worst reaction to ephedra, but many other plants left residues too. I got footprints tracked all over the carpet from it, and when I shampooed the carpet, it merely spread it around over a wider area, so that every inch of the apartment floor was covered with a thin layer of residues that I reacted to. I had to do drastic things like cover parts of the floor with cardboard so that I could live in there.
The residues do not decay over time. It's true that they oxidize and change somewhat, however they are still active drugs that cause symptoms. Ephedrine and pseudoephedrine are known to have an extremely long shelf life, and they remain unchanged for decades and are still just as active as they were the first day.
So I got the drug residues onto many of my belongings, and have had to throw many things away. They are still on many of my things that I've kept, and I still have reactions often, although not as badly or as often as I used to.
I also notice drug residues (now that I know they exist) when I go to the doctor's office. When I went to the doctor and sat in the chair next to a desk, I got something on me that remained on my clothes and continued to cause a reaction after I got home. It felt like some kind of antidepressant.
I learned to notice various residues at my friend Peter's house. He uses a lot of prescription drugs, including insulin, and I get hypoglycemia just from touching his insulin, which I have done a couple of times while handling or trying to help him fix his insulin pump. Once, the hypoglycemia made me feel so horrible I thought I would have to call an ambulance the same way Peter always has to get an ambulance for it.
That wasn't a short story, it was a medium length story. But that is what the drug residues are about, and that is why I'm still talking about them after all this time. They are very hard to get rid of. The best way to get rid of them is to throw away as many of your belongings as you can.
They influence my moods and cause me to become more manic. However, when I am being manic, when I am suggestible (which is usually caused by St. John's Wort), I do whatever 'they' tell me to do, and that means that the words that I write are not my own.
I often agree with the words, at least somewhat, but I disagree with the particular way of saying them, or the particular goals and methods chosen for how and where to say them. They are a distorted and partial version of the truth, and not the whole truth, and not the uncorrupted truth.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
No one can see me at my best
Less is more. I liked reading at The Socionist's blog about not having an internet connection, and so, being forced to make sure you get it all done in one session at a public internet cafe or library or somewhere. That's similar to when I was going to the library to use the internet. I have a lot of junk online everywhere but no one can see my potential to function much better than this. They all see the puppet who says what she is forced to say, and they see a disorganized person who isn't purposeful and goal-oriented. I am still being strongly affected by chemical sensitivity and because of that am nowhere near as healthy as I want to be. And I cannot speak my own true words or be oriented to my own true goals when I am a puppet. The world sees the worst that I can do, not the best.
I have to go to work right now, or I'd write more.
I have to go to work right now, or I'd write more.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
I overdosed on ENFps today.
10:53 PM 3/1/11
Well, here is what I did today. I talked for several hours on the phone to an ENFp guy who responded to my ad asking for ENFps. This was the first phone conversation that I have had with them. I haven't talked on the phone yet to the other ENFp that has been emailing me.
I thought I was exhausted after that. But then I went online and I read what's-his-face's blog again, The Socionist, and he mentioned something about his activator being an LSE (did I get that right? Now I'm all confused. Maybe that wasn't what he said? Now I'm probably totally wrong about all of this and I will write a big retraction tomorrow explaining that I totally misunderstood everything). So after a moment of confusion, I figured out that he is an ENFp, which explains why I had this desperate, intense, frantic desire to tell him infinite amounts of stuff at once, and why I was feeling that way from the very first moment that I started reading his web pages. I forget which web page I came from - it was socionics.com or socionics.us or something, and he is either the author of that page, or one author contributing to it.
Meanwhile, I am also having a drug residue reaction today, which has increased my excitement level and intensity level.
So I had to go write an inappropriate comment on his blog suggesting something to the effect of me wanting to have his ten children, or something like that, although that's not exactly what I wrote, lol.
Then he has also written about ascetiscism. He doesn't watch TV, he doesn't use a car, (and I'm jumping up and down frantically while reading this because these are all things that I agree with and want to do), they eat a healthy diet (I think he said he was married, and it doesn't matter, he is in Ukraine I think, I will never meet him), he doesn't have an internet connection at home! who does that sound like! I have gone through several phases of rejecting the internet and not having it at home, on purpose or by accident, and being happy about it not being there... He said all this stuff that I totally agree with.
What does this mean to me - well, first, after I clean up the drug residue that is triggering the reaction, I will calm down and go back to normal, but my brain is all overstimulated after talking on the phone several hours and then going online and reading even more material written by another dual who I didn't know was a dual. What it means to me is that there are people out there, people who exist, who agree with almost everything that I believe, everything that matters to me, everything that is important to me, and I know a 'secret code' that can help me find these people, and that if one person is like that, then others will be too, and I can find them. I don't have this much of an intense reaction to the guy I was talking to on the phone - my intense reaction was to the blog I was reading, after having already been on the phone several hours. I know that I will not meet this particular person, so I tell myself that if he exists, then someone else must exist too, and I know what I need to do to find them.
I will be back to normal after I clean off the drug and go get some sleep.
On the phone with the one guy he had said we should force ourselves to try to have an argument about something. I couldn't think of anything, but in reality, there are major things that I would argue about. I said that if we had children, then I would respond with physical violence if somebody tried to take my son away to get him circumcised - I would physically fight violently to prevent them from taking him. I would be screaming and hitting and biting like an animal. He agreed with my spirit on that, and said that he himself had had his son circumcised and had been there when it happened, and heard his son screaming. He said that in that situation, his grandfather (or some relative, I forget) had insisted that the son be circumcised.
There are other things now that I will argue about, in addition to circumcision. My arguments are about children, about their physical bodies. I got overexcited after reading that blog because it said to me that someone out there in the universe agrees with me about a lot of very important life-or-death things. There are more things that he did not write about (at The Socionist), which I thought of after getting off the phone with the one guy.
1. No vaccines for children or adults or anyone. This becomes a major issue, because it leads to: no public school. Public schools require vaccination, as far as I know. Retmeishka is an intentional religion, and one of the purposes of this intentional religion is to put strength behind us when we talk to the government and say things like 'My religion forbids me to vaccinate my children,' and 'My religion forbids people to be drafted into the army,' and things like that.
2. Do not give birth in a hospital. Make plans for what you will do if there is a life-threatening emergency. If there is no emergency, give birth at home. Breastfeeding is required and there is no alternative of any kind. Ignore anyone who says that this or that particular formula recipe is a good one. Find a wet nurse ahead of time to support you if there is difficulty.
3. Never give anyone dental fillings of any kind. There is no safe type of dental filling - all of them are extremely harmful, although mercury fillings are the worst. Do not use dental fillings at all. Use dietary methods to get rid of cavities and prevent them in the first place. Do not use orthodontics. Do not remove any permanent teeth, or any teeth at all unless they fall out by themselves.
I'm sure there are more that I'll think of.
It was the ascetiscism blog that excited me the most. I need to find a dual who agrees with me about all of those things, and lives nearby, and finds me physically attractive, who I also find attractive, who wants to have children with me. This is an almost total rejection of modern culture, an extreme lifestyle, and SOMEONE ELSE AGREES WITH ME ABOUT THIS!!! My brain is fried after too much dualism for too many hours. I don't even have enough energy left in me to write an email to the other guy who is expecting an email from me - I will have to do it later tonight or tomorrow morning or sometime.
Ichazo's instinctual stackings, 'info from the underground,' that website - the self-pres/social stacking is what I think I have. But then what's-his-name says that the SLI's 'type message' is 'live a healthy lifestyle,' that kind of thing - but I think that depends on your instinctual stacking. And I totally agree with it, too - that's the best description of my message that I saw. I should go chill. I also think that I might possibly be ovulating or getting ready to ovulate, because all of a sudden everything is all about having babies, for the past day or so.
Well, here is what I did today. I talked for several hours on the phone to an ENFp guy who responded to my ad asking for ENFps. This was the first phone conversation that I have had with them. I haven't talked on the phone yet to the other ENFp that has been emailing me.
I thought I was exhausted after that. But then I went online and I read what's-his-face's blog again, The Socionist, and he mentioned something about his activator being an LSE (did I get that right? Now I'm all confused. Maybe that wasn't what he said? Now I'm probably totally wrong about all of this and I will write a big retraction tomorrow explaining that I totally misunderstood everything). So after a moment of confusion, I figured out that he is an ENFp, which explains why I had this desperate, intense, frantic desire to tell him infinite amounts of stuff at once, and why I was feeling that way from the very first moment that I started reading his web pages. I forget which web page I came from - it was socionics.com or socionics.us or something, and he is either the author of that page, or one author contributing to it.
Meanwhile, I am also having a drug residue reaction today, which has increased my excitement level and intensity level.
So I had to go write an inappropriate comment on his blog suggesting something to the effect of me wanting to have his ten children, or something like that, although that's not exactly what I wrote, lol.
Then he has also written about ascetiscism. He doesn't watch TV, he doesn't use a car, (and I'm jumping up and down frantically while reading this because these are all things that I agree with and want to do), they eat a healthy diet (I think he said he was married, and it doesn't matter, he is in Ukraine I think, I will never meet him), he doesn't have an internet connection at home! who does that sound like! I have gone through several phases of rejecting the internet and not having it at home, on purpose or by accident, and being happy about it not being there... He said all this stuff that I totally agree with.
What does this mean to me - well, first, after I clean up the drug residue that is triggering the reaction, I will calm down and go back to normal, but my brain is all overstimulated after talking on the phone several hours and then going online and reading even more material written by another dual who I didn't know was a dual. What it means to me is that there are people out there, people who exist, who agree with almost everything that I believe, everything that matters to me, everything that is important to me, and I know a 'secret code' that can help me find these people, and that if one person is like that, then others will be too, and I can find them. I don't have this much of an intense reaction to the guy I was talking to on the phone - my intense reaction was to the blog I was reading, after having already been on the phone several hours. I know that I will not meet this particular person, so I tell myself that if he exists, then someone else must exist too, and I know what I need to do to find them.
I will be back to normal after I clean off the drug and go get some sleep.
On the phone with the one guy he had said we should force ourselves to try to have an argument about something. I couldn't think of anything, but in reality, there are major things that I would argue about. I said that if we had children, then I would respond with physical violence if somebody tried to take my son away to get him circumcised - I would physically fight violently to prevent them from taking him. I would be screaming and hitting and biting like an animal. He agreed with my spirit on that, and said that he himself had had his son circumcised and had been there when it happened, and heard his son screaming. He said that in that situation, his grandfather (or some relative, I forget) had insisted that the son be circumcised.
There are other things now that I will argue about, in addition to circumcision. My arguments are about children, about their physical bodies. I got overexcited after reading that blog because it said to me that someone out there in the universe agrees with me about a lot of very important life-or-death things. There are more things that he did not write about (at The Socionist), which I thought of after getting off the phone with the one guy.
1. No vaccines for children or adults or anyone. This becomes a major issue, because it leads to: no public school. Public schools require vaccination, as far as I know. Retmeishka is an intentional religion, and one of the purposes of this intentional religion is to put strength behind us when we talk to the government and say things like 'My religion forbids me to vaccinate my children,' and 'My religion forbids people to be drafted into the army,' and things like that.
2. Do not give birth in a hospital. Make plans for what you will do if there is a life-threatening emergency. If there is no emergency, give birth at home. Breastfeeding is required and there is no alternative of any kind. Ignore anyone who says that this or that particular formula recipe is a good one. Find a wet nurse ahead of time to support you if there is difficulty.
3. Never give anyone dental fillings of any kind. There is no safe type of dental filling - all of them are extremely harmful, although mercury fillings are the worst. Do not use dental fillings at all. Use dietary methods to get rid of cavities and prevent them in the first place. Do not use orthodontics. Do not remove any permanent teeth, or any teeth at all unless they fall out by themselves.
I'm sure there are more that I'll think of.
It was the ascetiscism blog that excited me the most. I need to find a dual who agrees with me about all of those things, and lives nearby, and finds me physically attractive, who I also find attractive, who wants to have children with me. This is an almost total rejection of modern culture, an extreme lifestyle, and SOMEONE ELSE AGREES WITH ME ABOUT THIS!!! My brain is fried after too much dualism for too many hours. I don't even have enough energy left in me to write an email to the other guy who is expecting an email from me - I will have to do it later tonight or tomorrow morning or sometime.
Ichazo's instinctual stackings, 'info from the underground,' that website - the self-pres/social stacking is what I think I have. But then what's-his-name says that the SLI's 'type message' is 'live a healthy lifestyle,' that kind of thing - but I think that depends on your instinctual stacking. And I totally agree with it, too - that's the best description of my message that I saw. I should go chill. I also think that I might possibly be ovulating or getting ready to ovulate, because all of a sudden everything is all about having babies, for the past day or so.
This whole rant about bulky websites started because of Soaring Eagle's dreadlocks site.
2:14 PM 3/1/11
This whole rant about frames and plain text started because of http://www.dreadlockssite.com/ (I hope that's the right URL - I'm not looking at it right now - I might have it confused with another site).
That dreadlocks site called itself a 'facebook for dreadheads.' As of yesterday, I am now an officially registered, licensed, officially recognized dreadhead, you know, with my own dreadhead ID# and everything, and they're sending me my collar and name tag in the mail and I will be proudly owned by the dreadhead community. (It's like Lady and the Tramp, where he's all happy to get his new collar. I need to watch that movie again - it's been a couple decades since I saw it - I would notice nuances of meaning that I wasn't aware of when I was a child!) Don't take me literally, I'm joking. But I am an officially registered member of that site now. So if anybody needs to find a dreadhead for some reason, in Bellefonte PA, they know where to find me now.
Well, anyway. I am having a little problem. My computer-browser-dialup arrangement doesn't like that website. It takes an EXTREMELY long time to load, and I can't even see WHAT it's loading. If I view it the way they meant it to be viewed, it locks up one of my old versions of Opera - the one I prefer to use. I have to push a button to display the page differently. But I can view it in a new version of Opera, but that version has some technical problems - and my computer needs a massive cleanup, which I haven't gotten around to - and so it tends to lock up too, and it takes like more than five minutes to load.
Well, I have glanced around the site, and it's my understanding that this site belongs to Soaring Eagle. Soaring Eagle is a guy in a wheelchair, with floor-length dreadlocks that he's been growing for a couple decades, and a beard. And I get the impression from glancing around that YOU DO NOT F*CK WITH SOARING EAGLE. That's just the feeling I get. Soaring Eagle is the master of this community.
So, here I am, and I am just a clueless newbie. A clueless newbie does not go up to Soaring Eagle and say, 'Um, Soaring Eagle? I am but a newbie. And I was thinking that if you totally redesigned your website from scratch, it would work better in my old browser. But, that was just a thought! Don't mind me!' I have a long way to go to earn my status there.
I actually feel that same way about other websites, like Wordpress.com - I wish I could go tell them to totally rebuild it from the ground up so that it would be lightweight in my browser - but I don't see the human faces behind Wordpress.com, and if I did see them, they would be short-haired and shaved - ordinary people, not that respectable, not that intimidating. I wouldn't fear them all that much. I wouldn't feel the same way that I would feel going up to Soaring Eagle. When I walk up to Soaring Eagle, I will bow my head.
This whole rant about frames and plain text started because of http://www.dreadlockssite.com/ (I hope that's the right URL - I'm not looking at it right now - I might have it confused with another site).
That dreadlocks site called itself a 'facebook for dreadheads.' As of yesterday, I am now an officially registered, licensed, officially recognized dreadhead, you know, with my own dreadhead ID# and everything, and they're sending me my collar and name tag in the mail and I will be proudly owned by the dreadhead community. (It's like Lady and the Tramp, where he's all happy to get his new collar. I need to watch that movie again - it's been a couple decades since I saw it - I would notice nuances of meaning that I wasn't aware of when I was a child!) Don't take me literally, I'm joking. But I am an officially registered member of that site now. So if anybody needs to find a dreadhead for some reason, in Bellefonte PA, they know where to find me now.
Well, anyway. I am having a little problem. My computer-browser-dialup arrangement doesn't like that website. It takes an EXTREMELY long time to load, and I can't even see WHAT it's loading. If I view it the way they meant it to be viewed, it locks up one of my old versions of Opera - the one I prefer to use. I have to push a button to display the page differently. But I can view it in a new version of Opera, but that version has some technical problems - and my computer needs a massive cleanup, which I haven't gotten around to - and so it tends to lock up too, and it takes like more than five minutes to load.
Well, I have glanced around the site, and it's my understanding that this site belongs to Soaring Eagle. Soaring Eagle is a guy in a wheelchair, with floor-length dreadlocks that he's been growing for a couple decades, and a beard. And I get the impression from glancing around that YOU DO NOT F*CK WITH SOARING EAGLE. That's just the feeling I get. Soaring Eagle is the master of this community.
So, here I am, and I am just a clueless newbie. A clueless newbie does not go up to Soaring Eagle and say, 'Um, Soaring Eagle? I am but a newbie. And I was thinking that if you totally redesigned your website from scratch, it would work better in my old browser. But, that was just a thought! Don't mind me!' I have a long way to go to earn my status there.
I actually feel that same way about other websites, like Wordpress.com - I wish I could go tell them to totally rebuild it from the ground up so that it would be lightweight in my browser - but I don't see the human faces behind Wordpress.com, and if I did see them, they would be short-haired and shaved - ordinary people, not that respectable, not that intimidating. I wouldn't fear them all that much. I wouldn't feel the same way that I would feel going up to Soaring Eagle. When I walk up to Soaring Eagle, I will bow my head.
OIC - Google doesn't catch the index page of a framed site!
I see what google did. Google found the pages within the site, but it did not list the index page, the page where you can actually see the navigation frame on the left, and the individual pages on the right. So google won't list your index page in its results.
That means you have to make sure every page has a link to the main page on it. That will get you back to the framed section if you find a page through google.
That doesn't bother me. Why is that so bad? (I'm sure there's an answer to 'why is that so bad?' Some more experienced web designer would know, someone who struggled with frames and gave up on them in disgust and started using artificial frames instead.) Fake frames... I insist, my site will use real frames, not fake ones. No matter what people say about how 'you can do the same thing a different way using CSS or whatever,' I don't care - it's not the same at all. I've never seen an imitation frame that behaved exactly like a real frame. And why not? Frames are so great, that everyone ought to be finding out how to create an exact duplicate of them, something that works exactly the same way but without the drawbacks of frames! Why aren't more people using excellent imitations of frames? Why aren't they spending more time and effort to do this?
What do I like so much about a frame?
It doesn't disappear and reappear!
When you click links on fake frames, the ENTIRE PAGE disappears, and you sit there staring at a white screen for a few seconds, or a few minutes, depending on how bad the page is. Everything disappears completely and has to be rewritten.
On a real frame, you click a link, and the frame stays there, still visible. You can keep looking at the same point on the screen. You don't lose your place. You can keep mulling over what's written there, glancing down the list of things you're about to click on. It stays there and it never leaves. While the display page loads (and this only takes a few seconds if it's plain text!), you can think about which link in the frame you're going to click next.
Oh, it's trivial? It's trivial to be annoyed that the entire page disappears? Guess what, it's not trivial to me. Why isn't anybody making a fake frame that behaves that way - that doesn't disappear after you click on it? If it already exists, why aren't more people using it?
Well, THAT took all the wind out of my sails - I just did something in my opera browser. There is a button called 'links' in the opera browser. When you push this button, the browser gives you a frame (in the browser) with all of the links that it collected from the web page you're viewing. You can click 'lock' and it will keep all of those links no matter which page you go to. That is what I want to see on a web page.
What's the problem with just using the 'links' frame in the opera browser? Well, it gives you a zillion links in a messy, disorganized way. Those links weren't intentionally designed to be written in a particular order to be nice for viewing in a frame.
The 'links' button is useful sometimes when I can't easily see where all the links are on a page. Opera finds them for me and puts them in a column so that I can click them easily.
But it turns out that on most web pages, there are tons of links that I want to ignore and never use. Or hardly ever. All of those links are listed in the opera links frame, and they are usually at the top, above all of the 'real' links that I want to see. Okay... let me make sure I don't have any embarrassing windows open... I'm going to take a screenshot.
Uh-oh, how do I... okay, it seems to be all right. That is supposed to be a thumbnail. I don't use images very often because they slow down the page when it loads, but I will tolerate a thumbnail now and then.
Anyway, so that links button in opera still isn't quite what I want. The links aren't organized well, because nobody meant for them to be lined up in a column. So it's hard to find the links you're looking for. But yes, that functions the same way a real frame does. Everything else about it is good. I just want a framed web page where the links are intended to be viewed in a column and are intended to be pushed while you watch the content loading on the right side of the screen (or the left side, or the bottom, or whatever).
Yes! I have six shortcuts to six different versions of Opera on my toolbar! Nothing wrong with that! It was because of a technical problem!
That means you have to make sure every page has a link to the main page on it. That will get you back to the framed section if you find a page through google.
That doesn't bother me. Why is that so bad? (I'm sure there's an answer to 'why is that so bad?' Some more experienced web designer would know, someone who struggled with frames and gave up on them in disgust and started using artificial frames instead.) Fake frames... I insist, my site will use real frames, not fake ones. No matter what people say about how 'you can do the same thing a different way using CSS or whatever,' I don't care - it's not the same at all. I've never seen an imitation frame that behaved exactly like a real frame. And why not? Frames are so great, that everyone ought to be finding out how to create an exact duplicate of them, something that works exactly the same way but without the drawbacks of frames! Why aren't more people using excellent imitations of frames? Why aren't they spending more time and effort to do this?
What do I like so much about a frame?
It doesn't disappear and reappear!
When you click links on fake frames, the ENTIRE PAGE disappears, and you sit there staring at a white screen for a few seconds, or a few minutes, depending on how bad the page is. Everything disappears completely and has to be rewritten.
On a real frame, you click a link, and the frame stays there, still visible. You can keep looking at the same point on the screen. You don't lose your place. You can keep mulling over what's written there, glancing down the list of things you're about to click on. It stays there and it never leaves. While the display page loads (and this only takes a few seconds if it's plain text!), you can think about which link in the frame you're going to click next.
Oh, it's trivial? It's trivial to be annoyed that the entire page disappears? Guess what, it's not trivial to me. Why isn't anybody making a fake frame that behaves that way - that doesn't disappear after you click on it? If it already exists, why aren't more people using it?
Well, THAT took all the wind out of my sails - I just did something in my opera browser. There is a button called 'links' in the opera browser. When you push this button, the browser gives you a frame (in the browser) with all of the links that it collected from the web page you're viewing. You can click 'lock' and it will keep all of those links no matter which page you go to. That is what I want to see on a web page.
What's the problem with just using the 'links' frame in the opera browser? Well, it gives you a zillion links in a messy, disorganized way. Those links weren't intentionally designed to be written in a particular order to be nice for viewing in a frame.
The 'links' button is useful sometimes when I can't easily see where all the links are on a page. Opera finds them for me and puts them in a column so that I can click them easily.
But it turns out that on most web pages, there are tons of links that I want to ignore and never use. Or hardly ever. All of those links are listed in the opera links frame, and they are usually at the top, above all of the 'real' links that I want to see. Okay... let me make sure I don't have any embarrassing windows open... I'm going to take a screenshot.
Uh-oh, how do I... okay, it seems to be all right. That is supposed to be a thumbnail. I don't use images very often because they slow down the page when it loads, but I will tolerate a thumbnail now and then.Anyway, so that links button in opera still isn't quite what I want. The links aren't organized well, because nobody meant for them to be lined up in a column. So it's hard to find the links you're looking for. But yes, that functions the same way a real frame does. Everything else about it is good. I just want a framed web page where the links are intended to be viewed in a column and are intended to be pushed while you watch the content loading on the right side of the screen (or the left side, or the bottom, or whatever).
Yes! I have six shortcuts to six different versions of Opera on my toolbar! Nothing wrong with that! It was because of a technical problem!
Google knows I exist!!! (My hand-coded, gibberish-filled, free-hosted website with frames)
I read someplace recently that there was a problem with frames and search engine optimization. Supposedly, if google sees that your website uses frames, it lowers it in the search results... but I don't know the details, and I don't know whether I really understood it or not. (And I am having a brain fog day, and no matter how hard I struggle to think, it just doesn't happen.) It's not that simple, and I'm not explaining it properly... There's something about frames that can mislead google to think that there are lots and lots of results from your page, when actually it should be viewed as only one result... or something. So they changed the algorithm to take away points and make it more fair. That's a vague, general, poorly understood explanation of what they did.
My foggy brain interpreted this as, 'Oh no! Framed pages are handicapped now! They'll show up buried hundreds of miles deep at the very end of Google's 100,000 results!'
That might not be true. As I said, I'm trying to grasp these complex ideas using a chronic-fatigued brain that hasn't been working very well in the past few weeks. (Can you tell I'm not feeling too well today?)
I searched for 'kaniata' on google. It turns out that Kaniata is the name of a real town in Mali. But when I created that word, I created it as gibberish, as glossolalia. It was meant to be a unique word like Retmeishka. But instead, there are many other search results for the word Kaniata, since it is an actual town.
It turns out that my tiny little gibberish-filled hand-coded website is actually relatively high up in the google results for the word kaniata.
The website is http://kaniata.atwebpages.com/. I made it at batcave.net/. It's just a test page. Since I mentioned it in my blog, google knows it exists, because google looks for pages that people are linking to. If anyone clicks that link from my blog, it tells google that page is important to someone. That is how google found out that I exist.
I have my google set up to display 100 results per page, so you won't see it if you search for it and you are showing only 10 results per page. But for me, it's on the first page, a little way down. That might be on the second page of the results if you are showing 10 results per page. I don't want to go test that and mess with it right now. It's a hassle and I'm mentally not up for it.
Google knows I exist! Even though I used frames. Frames are not as badly cursed as I imagined they were! This makes me feel hopeful and excited.
I have this excitement about fighting a hopeless, losing, impossible battle. My battle: to make a really good website that uses frames. I'd like to make a social network, or a forum - something that other people will use to interact with each other - and a requirement of this project is that it must use frames. This isn't some requirement that you can get around. It is the heart and soul, the very center, of what this project is about. Frames are the whole point. Frames are everything. They are non-negotiable.
I want to learn about every possible hack that was ever invented to get around the problems that browsers have with frames. I also want a browser designed in a special way to display frames without any problems. Those problems don't have to happen. They aren't necessary and inevitable. They are not a law of nature. They happen because, for some reason, nobody ever bothered to fix them, and people moved on, and they forgot about frames.
Frames are the best way to design a web page. I have never seen anything that ever came close to functioning as well as a frame, period. All of the imitation frames are a poor substitute, and I can see this because I am on dialup and using an old computer and a browser that doesn't like all these new, heavy, bulky, slow-loading web pages.
Slow loading web pages are still bad even when I use them on my brand new netbook on a wi-fi connection! They are still slow! So that means everybody everywhere must feel that they are slow. It isn't just because I'm on dialup. Even cable users are experiencing slow, bulky web pages filled with unnecessary garbage when plain text will do.
So I want another website in the spirit of Craigslist.org and PlentyOfFish.com - pure function, pure high-quality content, plain text, nothing more. And I insist: it will use frames. I don't care about anything - it WILL use frames. Period. I don't care what I have to hack, I don't care what roundabout methods I have to use.
My foggy brain interpreted this as, 'Oh no! Framed pages are handicapped now! They'll show up buried hundreds of miles deep at the very end of Google's 100,000 results!'
That might not be true. As I said, I'm trying to grasp these complex ideas using a chronic-fatigued brain that hasn't been working very well in the past few weeks. (Can you tell I'm not feeling too well today?)
I searched for 'kaniata' on google. It turns out that Kaniata is the name of a real town in Mali. But when I created that word, I created it as gibberish, as glossolalia. It was meant to be a unique word like Retmeishka. But instead, there are many other search results for the word Kaniata, since it is an actual town.
It turns out that my tiny little gibberish-filled hand-coded website is actually relatively high up in the google results for the word kaniata.
The website is http://kaniata.atwebpages.com/. I made it at batcave.net/. It's just a test page. Since I mentioned it in my blog, google knows it exists, because google looks for pages that people are linking to. If anyone clicks that link from my blog, it tells google that page is important to someone. That is how google found out that I exist.
I have my google set up to display 100 results per page, so you won't see it if you search for it and you are showing only 10 results per page. But for me, it's on the first page, a little way down. That might be on the second page of the results if you are showing 10 results per page. I don't want to go test that and mess with it right now. It's a hassle and I'm mentally not up for it.
Google knows I exist! Even though I used frames. Frames are not as badly cursed as I imagined they were! This makes me feel hopeful and excited.
I have this excitement about fighting a hopeless, losing, impossible battle. My battle: to make a really good website that uses frames. I'd like to make a social network, or a forum - something that other people will use to interact with each other - and a requirement of this project is that it must use frames. This isn't some requirement that you can get around. It is the heart and soul, the very center, of what this project is about. Frames are the whole point. Frames are everything. They are non-negotiable.
I want to learn about every possible hack that was ever invented to get around the problems that browsers have with frames. I also want a browser designed in a special way to display frames without any problems. Those problems don't have to happen. They aren't necessary and inevitable. They are not a law of nature. They happen because, for some reason, nobody ever bothered to fix them, and people moved on, and they forgot about frames.
Frames are the best way to design a web page. I have never seen anything that ever came close to functioning as well as a frame, period. All of the imitation frames are a poor substitute, and I can see this because I am on dialup and using an old computer and a browser that doesn't like all these new, heavy, bulky, slow-loading web pages.
Slow loading web pages are still bad even when I use them on my brand new netbook on a wi-fi connection! They are still slow! So that means everybody everywhere must feel that they are slow. It isn't just because I'm on dialup. Even cable users are experiencing slow, bulky web pages filled with unnecessary garbage when plain text will do.
So I want another website in the spirit of Craigslist.org and PlentyOfFish.com - pure function, pure high-quality content, plain text, nothing more. And I insist: it will use frames. I don't care about anything - it WILL use frames. Period. I don't care what I have to hack, I don't care what roundabout methods I have to use.
Bookeeping is like beekeeping, except with ghosts
That's how you can remember that 'bookkeeping' has two k's. I am going to slowly, gradually try getting jobs as a bookkeeper. I'm going to start by working for the temp agencies.
However, I am also kind of a ghostbuster in a way, so it's like bookeeping. When I look for fellow sufferers of electronic harassment, I can find a lot more people if I include people who interpret their experiences as being paranormal or caused by ghosts.
Yes, this is a frivolous post.
I am annoyed - I think 'they' deleted some of my comments again on my blog. Actually, 'annoyed' is the wrong word. I am helplessly resigned to enduring a harassment that I cannot fight back against at this point in time. That's not the same as actively expressing or feeling annoyance. What I actually feel is learned helplessness, and deeply repressed anger. And I don't know if it happened. I never know for sure, I just get suspicions.
However, I am also kind of a ghostbuster in a way, so it's like bookeeping. When I look for fellow sufferers of electronic harassment, I can find a lot more people if I include people who interpret their experiences as being paranormal or caused by ghosts.
Yes, this is a frivolous post.
I am annoyed - I think 'they' deleted some of my comments again on my blog. Actually, 'annoyed' is the wrong word. I am helplessly resigned to enduring a harassment that I cannot fight back against at this point in time. That's not the same as actively expressing or feeling annoyance. What I actually feel is learned helplessness, and deeply repressed anger. And I don't know if it happened. I never know for sure, I just get suspicions.
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