I should use MySpace for real

(I accidentally never published this post.  It was in my 'drafts' section.)

I've considered doing that for a long time now.  I could make a separate profile that my friends and family don't see.  Then I'd take some REAL pictures and let people see them.  I was looking there and I can see lots of barely legal and not yet legal 'little boys' that I could be friends with.  This is because I don't have a reliable way to communicate with the one person who I *do* want to see.

It's hard to do anything when I have chronic fatigue.  And I'm trying not to use St. John's Wort anymore, but back when I was using it, computer projects like that were easy to do.

Sometimes I ask, 'What will you do differently next time?'  I've been unable to communicate with Curtis, so I have to ask what I'll do next time to make sure that I'm able to reach him (the next person I try to bond with) without worrying about hackers, intercepted text messages, un-returned phone calls, and everything else.

'They', the voices, have been doing something this week - they've been telling me that Curtis quit his job.  I don't know if they're telling the truth, or if they're only saying that to scare me and upset me, because I told him (in an email) that I was going to look for someone else on the dating website so that I could leave him alone.  I don't know if he really did quit, but I know he's talked about it before, at times like these, when they cut people's hours.  He needs a second job.  He has to pay his child support.