I'm visiting my mom and dad in West Virginia next week. I already requested a vacation from work. But for some reason, they came up here to visit Aunt Jeannie today. It was unexpected. They come up here every once in a while, but it's usually Dad alone. Mom has trouble traveling because she gets uncomfortable sitting in the car for a long time, and also, she doesn't like leaving the horses alone, because one of them is sick. But anyway I went over to Aunt Jeannie's house and saw them tonight, very briefly, just to give them a hug and say hello.
When I saw them, I decided I'm going to go down to West Virginia more often. It's going to be an official routine. They're old. They're going to die. They are going to be gone forever. I'm lucky that nothing has happened yet to either one of them.
I saw my dad's neck. It's been a while since I saw him. His neck has that loose skin hanging down the way it does on old people. It wasn't like that a few years ago. I knew their hair was getting gray, although it's still not completely gray for either one of them. But they are both getting old saggy skin, and it was more noticeable than it ever was before. So I am going to go down a couple times a year to visit them. I am not going to wait anymore.
I was always hoping that I would be able to visit them with good news. Yay! My life has finally gotten better! I'm married and I have kids! I have a good job and I'm making a lot of money! I'm healthy and I have lots of energy! I'm working on creative projects and doing my artwork!
I hardly ever go down to West Virginia to visit them, mostly because I've usually been working two jobs, and so I have to schedule the visit at least a month in advance to make sure I can get the week off for both jobs. Technically, I could make an eight-hour trip down there, stay for a day, and then drive back up here, during my two days off work on an ordinary weekend. But that would suck.
It was the heartbreaking feeling of pain and grief that I felt when I said hello and then quickly left again after not seeing them in a long time. That's what made me decide. I'm not seeing them enough. It was because I have to go to work early in the morning tomorrow (which I don't usually do), and that's why mom didn't want me to stay long and talk. So I was there only a couple minutes.
This will be my official routine now. A couple times a year. I'd love to go down there four times a year, once every season. Even if I don't have any good news at all, I should go. They're going to die. I want to show them their grandchildren, but that's not ready yet.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
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