Tuesday, July 26, 2011

What is my ideal imaginary play scenario?; and, Edited something in previous post.

I changed something in the previous post.  I gave a description of an SEE personality type that I thought was inaccurately negative.  'Inaccurately negative' might be an understatement, and maybe I should call it 'total bullshit,' which is more what it was like.  I haven't spent a lot of time guessing people's types.  I haven't made much effort at it.  It takes experience.  You make a lot of mistakes.  I need to meet real world people and try to guess their types, and only then would I get a sense of how to describe them accurately. 

What is my ideal imaginary play scenario?

I've been thinking of imaginary play.  I've been reading and watching Harry Potter all these years because of a need to visit an imaginary world that is different from the normal world in wonderful ways.  I've wondered what kind of story I would want to write, if I could write.  I wrote fantasy stories long ago, but it's impossible for me to write fiction now while being attacked by the voices.  But I could ask myself what do I want, what do I need, from fiction and fantasy.

I don't like to read or write ultra-realistic stories.  I'm thinking of a way that Ayn Rand affected me.  Ayn Rand disapproved of magic and fantasy, disapproved of stories that took place on a faraway planet.  She wanted stories that happened on earth in modern times.  I understood her rationale when she explained it, but also, I myself always loved fantasy stories, and magic, and mystical stories, and other worlds.  So I felt that it was 'bad' to write fantasy stories.  That's not the reason why I stopped writing fiction - I think I just got busy going to college and that kind of thing.  But still it influenced me.

Now that I am coming full circle and questioning the ways that Ayn Rand affected me, I am questioning this.  I've read about imaginary play in children, and most modern psychologists agree that it's good for them, that it's healthy.  I remember playing, when I was a child, and I loved fantasy, and I agreed with the movies, like the Neverending Story, where a theme of the movie is 'don't forget how to use your imagination; imagination is good.' 

What happened to my imaginary play?

I used to play with toys.  I had a wide variety of small toys and action figures.  I sometimes played with 'girl' toys, like My Little Pony, and other times I played with monsters and action figures, usually both in the scenario.  The ponies would go exploring, and they would stumble upon the den full of monsters, who would then chase them home and raid the pony village, or whatever.  There was always a theme of exploring a fascinating new world someplace, something very different from your own world, and meeting some kind of danger or challenge there.  I didn't always just want them to experience peace and quiet and comfort.  I wanted them to learn things and use knowledge.  I remember that in order to defeat the monsters, the ponies would have to use some kind of special magic or knowledge that the monsters didn't have.  This type of play was satisfying to me.

However, over the years, I started to feel like I couldn't think of any more new ideas.  I remember that I continued to play with toys until my early to mid- teens, like 14 or even 15.  I remember that it just wasn't satisfying anymore.  I also realized that it wouldn't help just to buy some new and unfamiliar toys.  After a while, it's just another toy, and you still have to think of something good to do with it.

This was also partly because my next door neighbor, Jeremy, my best friend at the time, moved away, and I was left to play by myself.  I did not have any other friends who I got along with as well as I did with Jeremy.  He and I both enjoyed using our imaginations and doing fantasy play with toys.  My other friends did not.  They liked rough play, outdoor play, and sports, for instance.  They didn't like imagining plotlines and character development and the other things we did with toys.  It really was like writing stories or 'plays.'

Now that I know about socionics, and about psychology in general, I would be interested in the challenge of creating characters who stayed true to their type.  I recall having the problem that all the characters were like me.  It was hard to create any characters that were truly different from myself, or to understand their motivations and make them believable.

But I always loved exploring.  And I loved 'the unthinkable.'  Whatever it was that you couldn't possibly imagine on your own, that was what I loved.  In socionics terms I would say I was valuing Intueor.  I'd like to go to a world where everything was different.

But I imagined doing this, and it seemed like it was not enough.  I still wouldn't feel happy or satisfied with that.  Why not?  Because I suffer from constant physical pain and discomfort, and also, because I am constantly being targeted and attacked.  So in the ideal fantasy scenario, I would have to gather knowledge about special healing methods to cure my illnesses, and also, I would have to defeat the evil and regain my freedom. 

I liked the idea of 'gathering knowledge.'  In some of my old stories, I created scientific 'facts' that applied to the fantasy world.  For instance, there was a type of stone called Ithkahlsa.  This stone responded to the touch of a living creature.  If you touched it, it would suddenly melt into a liquid like mercury.  But the rest of the time, it stayed frozen hard like any other rock.  This actually reminds me of piezoelectric materials, or whatever the word is - piezo something.  There are materials in the real world that change in shape if you put an electric current through them, and that kind of thing. 


So that was a scientific 'fact' that I invented about the world of Darcon, my fictional planet.  And it was important for characters to learn these facts and use them for something.  I'm seeing the Profiteor socionic function here. 

I'm trying to imagine what types of challenges I want the characters to experience.  I don't want them to just go around fighting wars all the time, however, I do feel the need to fight against some kind of enemy and regain their freedom, especially freedom from enslavement.  I want to watch them escape from slavery and then go build the amazing and wonderful world that they weren't able to build while they were enslaved.  I like to watch them fulfill their potential.  I like to watch them growing up and changing over time. 

So anyway those are just some of the themes that I want to see or create in fiction.  Exploring, escaping from slavery, building something, using factual knowledge.  I also love themes of pregnancy and childbirth, for instance in the movie The Polar Bear King.  I don't want a movie where all the characters are adults, and it stays that way forever, and you see nothing but adults.  I like to see children in the movies.  I like to watch their successful progress over time.  That is yet another reason why I love the Harry Potter movies. 

I'll come back to this idea once in a while.

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