I told her(2) that she(1) told me that he said...

I am asking a second person to help with the note delivery.

There is this feeling of nostalgic, idealized fantasy around this 'lost' person. When you meet someone, barely get to know them (in reality) at all, and then suddenly lose them, you get this image of what kind of person they were, and have feelings about stuff connected to them. But it's all based on vague impressions and fantasy. I remember I've had this happen before. Everything about the lost person seems more important and nothing is taken for granted. (Of course, I do have some limited, but real, info from the disappearing blog.)

I don't read this author anymore, but, when I was in high school, I picked up a book by Ann Tyler, called Breathing Lessons. I ended up reading all of her books. They make me feel depressed nowadays and I haven't read them in a very long time. The books make me feel like 'Everything is hopeless, and there's no escape, so you'd better just settle down and get used to it.'

But I wrote a research paper in high school about how she had a 'lost character' in almost every one of her books, with almost no exceptions. It was somebody who disappeared early on in the story before you got to know them. It affected all of the characters and shaped the whole plot of the story. So if you read Ann Tyler, you know that some very important character will disappear early in the book, or else they already did before the book began, and it affects everything, and the characters feel this loss.

The lost character gets this idealized fantasy and feeling of nostalgia where everything about the lost person seems wonderful, amazing, and important. In day to day life, people don't get exaggerated quite that much when you get to know them and see them all the time. It's kind of like saying we 'take people for granted' in real relationships. But, it's possible to have real relationships with people, get to know them, see them all the time, but still not end up taking them for granted. I don't want people to think that all relationships end up inevitably having somebody take someone for granted, because it doesn't have to be that way.

I'm able to tolerate watching sports on TV, and I actually am getting into it (that's on the rare occasions when I am near a TV and somebody else has it on sports), because of this person, and I never did that before. I think to myself, so-and-so would have liked this, so I'll pay attention. I was always anti-sports (unless it was a sport that I had done myself, or could imagine myself doing, like ice skating, dancing, or skiing... actually, maybe I don't mind sports that much after all). I mean other sports that I didn't watch in the past. Maybe I wasn't into team sports, and I just liked solitary things done by only one person.

Well, anyway, the handwritten note delivery system is getting a new helper, or at least, I've asked and am waiting for her to reply.