disclaimer

9:43 PM 1/16/11

There are a few things that I worry about when people read my blog. I worry that they might think I would 'go postal,' that I would hurt other people, or that I would hurt myself.

I am a pacifist and I do not advocate initiating attacks against anyone. I might call myself a 'defensive pacifist' or a 'libertarian pacifist' because I don't believe in attacking others, but if someone attacks you, you can defend yourself. That means, at the level of single individuals, like if a robber attacks you in a dark alley when you're alone, it's okay to fight back, and you might hurt your attacker when you defend yourself.

In the realm of government, that's where many libertarians and objectivists and others disagree with each other. Some of them say it's okay to go to war against other countries. And I'm not going to get into that subject right now. I could talk about how the government lies to us about the reasons why we are going to war. I could talk about innocent civilians dying. I could talk about how they 'print money' or raise taxes to go to war. I could talk about how war never accomplishes anything useful. I'm not going to get into those subjects right now.

But I would say that I never advocate our government going to war against another government.

I was talking with the voices - it was last night - and telling them that we look towards life and hope, no matter how hopeless or impossible it might seem. We are REQUIRED to look towards life and hope. That is a vague abstraction, but it means that you can create a mental image of the future, and that future can look dark and depressing and 'dystopian' and terrible.

But the world is not all just one uniform thing. The world is a complex place with many parts, many layers, many areas, many interpretations. You can look for good things and then go find them, or build them, or create them, or bring them out of people. You must try, or attempt, to move towards, to gain, to achieve, to get those things, whatever good things there are, whether they are things or people or whatever. I had to talk about this with them because they were looking towards a terrible future and talking to me about it, and we were asking 'what are you hoping for?' So we had to talk about how to hope for something, in a peaceful way, without killing people.

And no, I do not advocate killing judges or members of government. I said it was a 'sinful thought.' That means, it was something, a feeling, that went through my mind, which I don't necessarily approve of or want to act upon. I felt that way when I heard about how a judge was killed and I wondered if he had any connection to the FLDS ranch. It is human to feel angry about something that you think was wrong (the FLDS ranch genocide), but that doesn't mean that I want people to go out and kill someone in retaliation. That causes someone else to retaliate against you. There are people who kill people who kill people. It goes on and on, endless retaliation.

So that is my disclaimer that I have to give. Killing people doesn't solve problems in the long run. In fact, before I got attacked, before I became unable to sit down and think and motivate myself and make plans, I was actually preparing to leave the country. I wanted to be an expatriate. I wanted to move to another country and get out of the USA. That is my REAL belief about how to solve the problem of war. That is what I always believed. You can't control the evil things that the government is doing. The best solution is to leave the country.

(I hate being a puppet. So much of the language is bullshit. 'The best solution' is a bullshit phrase that has no meaning, but they use it to fill in the space. All of my sentences have those meaningless phrases in them.)

('The best solution?' Best for whom? Best for what? Better than what other options? Why is it better than those other options? What does it 'solve?' What does it mean to 'solve' something? What goal is achieved? I'm not disagreeing that it will achieve some goal and that I wanted to do that back whenever I was able to think and make long-term plans without being attacked.)

Anyway the point of this was to give a disclaimer that I don't advocate killing anyone. And yes, I really do seem to be having a reaction to the pretzel chips with hummus, because I was fine for most of the day, and then I just ate some more of them now - I'm going to eat the rest of them - and I'm already getting agitated again.

that's all for now...

the voices told me that they were blocking my emails again. i wish i could tell people that i'm not ignoring them. i don't feel safe putting a mailing address online, and it didn't matter anyway - i used to have a post office box on my eagledove9 blog but never got any mail, and i don't have a PO box anymore. the hackers are able to hide the address on other web servers anyway, a censored version of the page. only face-to-face communication with handwritten pieces of paper (or typed printouts) is reliable.