Sick

I am so sick I can hardly eat today. I am eating mouse-sized nibbles out of a dry bagel. I'm at work and too tired to run around doing anything. I also have the sjw mania which makes me want to keep writing blogs. But I am too miserable to act obnoxious as I have been doing. I am painfully cold as the wind blows straight in every time I open the window to take the cash from people in drive thru. I have on a good coat but it's not enough right now. The heater is on and the sun is coming in the window, which is nice, but I want to be at home in the tub with all the heat cranked up.

I heard a radio show recently talking about smog and electricity. They mentioned that power companies don't want you to know how much electricity you're using, so it's on a hard to read meter far away outdoors, but someone made "the power detective" or something, to show you how much elec you use. It never occurred to me that they didn't WANT you to know your power usage, but that makes sense, because the power detective thing is so obvious it should have already existed. Is it the "electricity detective"? I'll have to look it up.

The thing with RDL: "they" try to convince me he reads my blog, etc etc. I want to talk more to him but I feel that he doesn't approve of having too many online friends since he is a minimal Internet user, sort of like the Amish, where you can't have it in the house. And he is married so there is a limit on the closeness level of his adoring fans (I'm finally on lunch break now). I am trying to reduce the extreme, paralyzing fear and intense desperate starving feeling which makes it impossible to just have a simple conversation with him in email. I can't talk to someone if I need them too much. It is a constant fear of being judged.